The Dirty Work
[I have decided that this blog will not only be used for writing on specific subjects as I feel inspired but as a day by day account of my activities and life for anyone who cares (anyone?). What this means is that unlike my "refined" articles and my books, this will be a raw diary. Hopefullly it won't bore you too much. ]
"So, what are you doing with all of that talent?!", my long ago ex-boyfriend, recording engineer and artist Donnie Anson cheerfully opened, calling from New York the other day.
"Scrubbing the toilet at the moment", I replied, to which he laughed. Did he think I was kidding?
I've become so domesticated. Part of that is required of parenthood. Part of it demanded by marriage. I certainly can't afford to hire someone to do my dirty work, although it is a struggle on my own, esp when my ocd is acting up. (Sometimes Mom will come for an hour before work and help me.) One scrub of the toilet can turn into four and tasks become twice as tedious. I can be a 'bit' of a hoarder and so cleaning around the clutter is hard. If there is one gripe people have with me it's the mess-a continued source of embarressment and frustration. It does me great good to finally be dealing with it.
I've accomplished a lot in terms of ridding myself of excess belongings in recent months, before and after Michael's departure. I rid myself of a $30 a month storage space and went through boxes upon boxes of items. I had a yard sale. (It was hardly worth the trouble. I made about $8 and the permit cost $10.) I gave away bags of clothing to friends and once picked through by them, what was left went to the thrift store. I donated still more, as Michael filled the car with spare computer parts, extra shoes, old toys and duplicate household items we'd aquired in all of our moves together and apart. We gave away a table and chair set, a desk, a small bookshelf, a twin bed, a complete weight set and a microwave. And there is still a great deal to go through, mostly paperwork at this point. My apartment is neater, more spacious and after the first leg of the clean-out I redecorated, hanging border and new photo collages on either side of a sparkling new mirror in the living room. I bought a dart board for the living room, and added a few lovely bright green plants. I put down a new rug and lit a scented candle on the glossy green make-believe marble table. It earned wows from nieghbors, the apartment manager, and my parents, when they came over Christmas. (I think Michael thought things improved, but he is notoriously picky and hard to please.)
So while I haven't moved any moutains, won any awards, or embarked on any grand adventures abroad in recent years, I am doing what needs to be done and it will ultimately result in a happier, healthier me with less stress. And my son, husband and I deserve that.
"So, what are you doing with all of that talent?!", my long ago ex-boyfriend, recording engineer and artist Donnie Anson cheerfully opened, calling from New York the other day.
"Scrubbing the toilet at the moment", I replied, to which he laughed. Did he think I was kidding?
I've become so domesticated. Part of that is required of parenthood. Part of it demanded by marriage. I certainly can't afford to hire someone to do my dirty work, although it is a struggle on my own, esp when my ocd is acting up. (Sometimes Mom will come for an hour before work and help me.) One scrub of the toilet can turn into four and tasks become twice as tedious. I can be a 'bit' of a hoarder and so cleaning around the clutter is hard. If there is one gripe people have with me it's the mess-a continued source of embarressment and frustration. It does me great good to finally be dealing with it.
I've accomplished a lot in terms of ridding myself of excess belongings in recent months, before and after Michael's departure. I rid myself of a $30 a month storage space and went through boxes upon boxes of items. I had a yard sale. (It was hardly worth the trouble. I made about $8 and the permit cost $10.) I gave away bags of clothing to friends and once picked through by them, what was left went to the thrift store. I donated still more, as Michael filled the car with spare computer parts, extra shoes, old toys and duplicate household items we'd aquired in all of our moves together and apart. We gave away a table and chair set, a desk, a small bookshelf, a twin bed, a complete weight set and a microwave. And there is still a great deal to go through, mostly paperwork at this point. My apartment is neater, more spacious and after the first leg of the clean-out I redecorated, hanging border and new photo collages on either side of a sparkling new mirror in the living room. I bought a dart board for the living room, and added a few lovely bright green plants. I put down a new rug and lit a scented candle on the glossy green make-believe marble table. It earned wows from nieghbors, the apartment manager, and my parents, when they came over Christmas. (I think Michael thought things improved, but he is notoriously picky and hard to please.)
So while I haven't moved any moutains, won any awards, or embarked on any grand adventures abroad in recent years, I am doing what needs to be done and it will ultimately result in a happier, healthier me with less stress. And my son, husband and I deserve that.
posted by Melody at 9:14 AM
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